The doldrums (random post)

What book was it that had the Doldrums in it? Something I was forced to read for school in like 3rd grade ... A Wrinkle in Time. That's it. I think. Anyway that is definitely what I'm going through right now, unless it's an initial stage of depression, which stages come and go so frequently in my life I cannot discern them from one another.

I don't seem to be motivated to do anything. Everything seems pointless. I'm turning into a fatalist. Why bother exercising? The calories I need to jog are actually making me fatter. Why bother cleaning? We're moving out in three weeks and I haven't washed the bathroom floors since we moved in here anyway, so why start now? Why bother disciplining Vaughn? It's harder on me than to just let her have her way. In that case, why bother showering? Luckily, I can draw the line there. I need to shower. Being clean is good. Well that's reassuring: as long as part of my OCD is still surfacing, I must not be a complete POS.

Maybe it's just that Mark is rubbing off on me. How he can get out of bed, day after day, and not make it, and not open the blinds before he turns on the lights unnecessarily, and leave tupperware in his briefcase for a week at a time, and spread his newly-shaved whiskers all over the entire bathroom ... these things are a mystery to me. (Side note: I think I must have done something right/wrong because he's made the bed all weekend. Should I be suspicious?) His goal in life is to be as inert as possible. Reading that makes me laugh OL.

Basically I just wanted to post but I have nothing to say. But Junebug was worth seeing, in case anyone cares. Cheers to North Carolina weirdos!

Think I'll go eat some cheese.