Home?

I was here:




And now I'm in dreary, old London. Not very welcoming to come "home." Ugh.

Mama taught me manners

When you stay at someone's home as a guest you should do the following:

1. Offer to help with any chores possible, such as cleaning the kitchen, helping make dinner, keeping your aura and chatchkes to a minimum.
2. Leave your room clean enough so that anyone may enter because you never know what your host/s might need in it. This means making your bed everyday; sorry.
3. Offer to pay for things that your host/s purchase/s at the grocery store that are entirely for you, even if your host has every intention of telling you, "Don't be ridiculous." It's a nice gesture at the very least.
4. Take up minimal time on your host's computer, as s/he might need it for a reason or might be under time constraints of which you are not aware. Particularly if you are visiting from a place that is six time zones away, it's likely your host needs the computer more urgently than you.
5. Clean up the shower if you left hair or foamy soap scum in it. Gross.
6. Finally, don't be a burden. If you know you're going to get in the way, stay out of it. Really.

All other niceties are appreciated but I'd say these are some general rules to obey.

Talk about scary

You want to really frighten a mom? Tell her that her child has given up naps.

Luckily my child has not. But as of yesterday afternoon, it seemed as though she had. Oi vey.

Note on last blog entry

I don't feel guilty enough to amend what I wrote, but I don't want any of my Christian friends to think that I'm pointing a finger at them or at their friends. I guess I mean to point a finger at those who claim a certain stance publicly in the name of Christ, as if it were all black and white and up to their judgment to start. What I'm most sick of is people tarnishing Christ's ideals, because no matter who he was, he was a good man and did NOT want hatred spread across the world.

I've about had it with the Christians

And isn't that a terrible thing to say? Especially since if I consider myself associated with any religion, it's Christianity. But what is with all this judging and condemning and moralizing? It's worse than being a mom and getting your kid on a schedule/not, giving it homemade organic food/not, breastfeeding/not, using a pacifier/not, letting kids watch tv/not. I mean, really, I think I'm getting so fed up with the judgments of other moms that I'm starting to take it out on Christianity. And why not? A bunch of crazies have ruined a perfectly good set of tenets and beliefs and they're making the entire bunch look bad, if not unacceptable. I honestly fear for Christianity, because the people who are just trying to do good for the world are ignored in light of all the idiots who profess the same religion. Why would I want to associate myself with that? I'm sure there are tons of answers to that question, such as making Christianity good again, but at this point, the whole thing is so f'ed up and out of control, I feel like we need to start all over again.

What we need is a new Messiah. That would get the ball rolling.

Oh crap. I just realized how Jews must feel regarding the Messiah ... and then Mormons and probably others too. (Never the Scientologists though. Never.)

Anyway I've been feeling guilty about not going to church and not participating in religion, even though I haven't felt guilty about abstaining from organized religion, per se, in years. I no longer feel any guilt. This is just too much.

See from whence this rant stemmed here.

Too bad stay-at-home moms can't get wasted all day

So I'm just going to have to drink caffeine until tomorrow morning. It will be SO worth it! Can you OD on this stuff?

The only way I'll ever get through today, or life in Britain for that matter, is with lots and LOTS of cigarettes.

Top Ten Reasons to move back to the US

10. Velveeta is a foreign substance here
9. UK healthcare is frightening
8. landlords suck worse in the UK than in the states
7. Vaughn might end up saying things like "pass-ta" and "tack-os" and "whilst" soon
6. Americans who stay here too long adopt fake accents. It hurts my feelings.
5. low, steel gray clouds for 6 months at a time = depressing and oppressive
4. where my Halloween at?
3. indoor swimming pools are for "the indoor kids," not my child (or me)
2. my buggy will never be as hip as the neighbors'
1. the Democratic party needs me

Cut ... it ...!

This was a saying between Boyd and me our freshman year at school, referencing the many chicks on South Campus in desperate need of a trim. And now it's in reference to myself. (Sorry but we are talking about hair on the head.) I'm using this space to justify what I've done in the last 12 months, albeit weakly. So I'm, um, running an experiment to see how long my hair can get while I live in Britain. And thus I'm cutting it twice a year during this two-year stint, which is actually more due to the fact that I can't find a place to cut it for less than $60.

Really, I just want to look like Gwyneth, aka, Cousin Itt.

See for yourself: